It’s only a matter of time before you can buy this.

I finally got my Dad to take my new Mr. Potato head out of the closet for me “he was in storage” but something just doesn’t seem right about this one?
The other spuds don’t flair their arms as much when they talk, and I didn’t know potatos had lisps when they talk?
Anyway, he seems happy; very very happy to be honest, maybe a little too happy.
I think I’ll put him back “in storage”


Oh crap, now the rest of them are doing it!

My first christmas, what’s with all the rocking horses?

My first Christmas, and what a year! New blocks, musical instruments, great food and 2 rocking horses.
I think it was my families mission this year to keep the rocking horse industry alive!
Mission accomplished.
The one my Mom and Dad bought me is a pretty good starter horse I suppose, but I think the manufacturer was trying to appeal to too large of an audience with it, it speaks with both a female and male voice depending on the ear you pull. Kind of like an uncle I have….I kid!
The other however, from my great Grandma is a hand-made super rocker that is sure to make visiting friends jealous for at least the next 6 years. I love it!
That’s all for now, I hope you all had a wonderful holidays, thanks for visiting me here.

B.Y.O.B. (bring your own bottle) Party!

Tomorrow is my first birthday, I can’t wait for the cake and the toys and the pizza.

I’ll be sure to post some pictures as soon as I get over the sugar high!

Hulk Hogan’s Ultimate Grill? Is this a joke?

I come from a “grilling family” where we really grill; outside, year-round, over coal or wood flames only.

This is what I know to be grilling.

Question: Because a meat or food product after being “cooked” has “grill lines”, has it in fact been grilled?

If you put racing stripes on a Dodge Neon is it then considered a “race car”?

I thought the biggest joke in the culinary world was the George Foreman grill, but I just learned today that another product has entered the market that will be challenging for the #1 spot of who can make chicken taste like tires better.

Enter: Hulk Hogan’s Ultimate Grill

What is it?

Basically, it’s a round version of the George Foreman Grill.

It’ll still make just about any meat taste just like tires, but now you can make enough for 6 dissatisfied dinner guests all at once.

Yeah!

What ya gunna do Brother, when the Hulkster cooks for you?

I recommend a gargle, rinse, spit and repeat.

I had the promo video up, but Hogans reps made me take it down….just look it up on you tube, it’s hillarity!

This story just begs for a “make the best joke” contest

Read this article, and send me your best joke to go with it.

Winner gets to be the winner, thats about all I can promise.

OSLO – A man has been arrested in Norway trying to smuggle two dozen snakes and geckos into the country by hiding them under his clothes. Customs agent Helge Breilid said Monday the 22-year-old Norwegian citizen was apprehended in the southern town of Kristiansand after getting off a ferry from Hirtshals, Denmark. He said the man had 14 royal pythons and 10 albino leopard geckos under his clothes.

Breilid said the non-venomous snakes — the smallest species in the python family — were hidden in stockings duct-taped to the man’s abdomen. The geckos were in boxes taped to his thighs.

Customs officials found the reptiles, which are not endangered, Sunday during a search following the discovery of a tarantula in one of the man’s bags.

Tristans Joke:

Are those 14 snakes and 10 lizards in your pants or are you just really happy to see me?

On a side note; I do believe the second a reptile is placed into a sock or box, taped to a mans body, then concealed under his clothes for a trip on a ferry, they should automatically be considered endangered.

Books are for eating.

Since I can’t read them, I might as well use them for the next best thing; sustenance.

I’m not learning much from them other than the book about animals tastes the same as the book about flowers.

Whatever helps with the teething!

Gotta go, playing with my Grandma.

T

Some kids have all the fun. Some kids hide in the garage attic. Which kid are you?

In reference to the “balloon boy” story flooding the media, I would like to throw this out there.

I challenge any kid, with access to a balloon like that, to not climb in and take a ride.

I would.

I know my Mom would have when she was little, and my father would probably hop in right now if he could.

Who wouldn’t?

If we should be surprised by anything with this whole “balloon boy” situation, it should be first; that the kid didn’t climb in (how is the garage attic more fun?), and second; that the Dad wasn’t smart enough to keep the kids away from the thing (my Dad locks the remote away, you better believe a balloon like that would be in a fortress).

If you don’t know what I’m talking about, just Google Balloon Boy, you’ll see soon enough.

“Balloon Boy”; that was your chance to grab life by the horns and you let us all down.

Not only did you give up your best hide-and-seek spot, you gave up the opportunity of flight in exchange for playtime in a box.

You’re the kind of kid that would take an apple over a Hershey’s bar aren’t you!

One thing is for sure, I bet you gave a couple of Star Wars/Star Trek nerds the thrill of their lives when they saw that thing flying by, and for that, I commend you.

 

Good work.

Now where would I find a Balloon like that?

Coffee Table or Fort?

Just some pictures of my new hiding place. I wish my Dad would play in here with me, but he doesn’t fit:)

I don’t believe it; was I really born into a world with people this stupid?

I don’t really know what to say to this; for once I am drawing a complete blank.

My Dad just read me this entry in the local newspaper, maybe you’ll find it funny.

Maybe you’ll find yourself asking why, why, why?

Either way, now you found it, so enjoy.

 

LITTLE ROCK, Ark. – Police said a would-be robber was in jail after losing his wallet during the attempted robbery then phoning the victim and asking for it to be returned. Little Rock police said the 23-year-old man was arrested on robbery charges Tuesday.

Police said the man tried to rob a man at gunpoint at his home but fled and dropped his wallet then later called and told the man to return the wallet at a service station in North Little Rock.

Little Rock police were interviewing the victim when the call came and notified North Little Rock police who found the suspect outside the service station and arrested him after a short foot chase.

 

 Seriously?

Just lock him up for life, no time-out corner would ever fix this kind of stupid!

Can I have that?

Alright; so my Dad has a million toys in his “studio” that I love to play with, but all I really care about is which one is mine? He won’t let me touch the Gretsch, any of the Telecasters, the Jazzmaster or the Strats. He did buy me a vintage 60’s Harmony 3/4 student guitar, but that is nowhere as cool as the electrics. Now, to be fair, he does let me hit the keys on his pianos, and I have hit the drums a time or two (those are fun) but I really want a chance at those electrics.

Maybe when I stop chewing on everything he might let me give them a try, teeth marks on the headstock might effect the resale value a bit.

Let’s rock.

My Dads Piano.

My Piano.